Yesterday, I faced some challenges dealing with some stuff really out of my control. Unfortunately, as much as I want to believe I can identify every variable of a situation to ward off potential issues, I cannot predict the future and need to just "let it go," like Elsa in Frozen.
Today, my family celebrated my lovely grandma's birthday. In an effort to kill birds with stones, I asked for some advice from my aunt and uncle. I am so thankful for them helping me to see I need to "keep it real" and just let the chips fall where they may.
My biggest regret for today:
Although my intent was to help a situation, had I been real with myself that I cannot foresee every variable, I wouldn't have lost valuable time celebrating my grandma's birthday. I'm very sorry and disappointed in myself.
Day 46: Heavenly Father, thank you for my family and their objectiveness. Thank you for reminding me through my poor judgement today lifting and trusting situations to you is truly the greatest gift I can give myself. Lord, thank you for the clarity I needed revealed to keep things real.
God, it's incredible how many times I've told others "just lift it to God, get it off your shoulders," yet I still have trouble practicing what I preach. I try to release control, release the worry, and just let you do your thing, but goodness it is so outside my comfort zone. Why is that? I know factually all I have achieved is through your great glory and mercy, so why is it out of my comfort zone? I'm a weirdo!!
Father God, I feel embarrassed sometimes to show my emotion about situations for which I'm sadly accustomed? I don't understand why one day I can be absolutely objective and disconnected emotionally, and the next day a blubbering fool about the same situation. I know you've provided us various outlets for expression, but does it have to be through tears? Haha! Well, regardless, thank you for using my family today to bring me back to an objective evaluation of my circumstances and offering realistic solutions.
Without you working through those with whom I sought counsel, I'd probably continue trying to maintain control of a situation, potentially harming myself emotionally or financially. Thank you.
I love you.
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